Allowing Your Kids To Struggle

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Teacups are beautiful, yet they’re very fragile and must be handled with extreme care. Today, university professors call our children just that, teacups. They see college students as very fragile because of overprotection. And while teacups are aesthetically pleasing, they are rarely used and of little value to us on a day to day basis.

As parents it’s hard to watch our children fail, so often we swoop in to make sure they don’t. In the process we create children that don’t know how to fail well. This month we want to process how we can STOP being our child’s superhero, and instead, allow them to develop the courage and problem solving skills to work through any issue life hands them. Check out this month’s video link to see a glimpse into WHY we need to allow our children to fail.

https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/123492185/b35e13831e

After Watching The Video:

Current culture says to our children, you can be anything you want to be. The truth is they can TRY to be anything that they want, but they will fail. Our children, just like us, have been uniquely designed and created for purpose. One of the biggest ideas that will help us discover that purpose is working through failure.

We allow our children to fail when we STOP overparenting. Overparenting is actually a word, and we’ve created it. Here’s the definition:

We overparent when we are excessively involved in the day to day life of our children, typically in the desire to shield them from difficult situations and help them succeed.

Of course we want our children to succeed. A researcher named La Ferle says this of overparenting, “We take personally the things that happen to our kids, and if our kids succeed, we are successful parents. If they fail, it’s a bad reflection on us. If we can get over that, then that’s good. Sometimes we need to step back and not use our kids as trophies.”

The Bible is clear that we are NOT enough, and it’s a good thing. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 says, “But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

Let’s ban together, committing to STOP overparenting, allow our children to fail, learn from those failures, and find that true strength comes from God IN them.

Partnering with you,

April